Sunday, December 16, 2012

The why's?

I'm sure I am not the only person on this planet that is saddened, horrified, and confused about the killings at Sandy Hook's Elementary school that transpired this past Friday.  I shook me to the very core of my being. And I could not begin to imagine the loss those closest to the community are feeling.

I know that many of us wake early in the morning, do quite a bit of fussing to get the littles out the door in time in the mornings to catch the bus. We walk them to the bus stop, kiss their little heads, hug their warm little bodies, and wish them to have a great day. We tell them that we love them and that we will see them when they get home. Or at least that is the way it should happen. Now I find myself wondering if after sending my children safely off to school if they will in fact return home.

Things like this should NEVER happen. We live in America damnit! I would understand that fear if we lived in the middle east where there are terrorist and suicide bombers on every corner. Things like this shouldn't happen here.

I'm hearing a lot of gun control talk. That is complete and utter bull shit. Guns do not kill people. People kill people. Then I'm hearing the whole "The system failed the shooter", "We need better mental health care", You know what, kiss my ass. The system didn't fail the shooter. The system failed 20 innocent children, babies that were just starting life! The system failed 6 adults, people that dedicated their lives to enrich the life and educate  those babies!

The sad things... This could happen to any of us.

I don't know the shooters back story. Nor do I care to. That man was a evil , vile ,  piece of trash! And he took the bitch way out by taking his own life!

I hear, " We never know God's plan" .... You know what? Eff that too. God had no part of this. It was the work of the Devil!

All I can say is, hold your babies a little tighter. Make sure they know that they are loved. Kiss them every night. Cherish every second that you get with them. You never know when it will be the last time you say " I love you baby, have a good day at school, and I will see you when you get home".

Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name.
Your Kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as in heaven
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our sins,
as we forgive those who sin against us.
Lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
For the kingdom,
the power and the glory are yours.
Now and for ever.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Self Pity

Ok, I am a hot mess today.

I have been laying around feeling sorry for myself.

This is the 1st Christmas without my Papaw being here.

The 1st Christmas we will have without Baja.

The 4th Christmas without my Mom and Dad.

And damnit all to Hell, it sucks Rudolph balls!  I miss them so very much. There are so many awesome things they have missed. So it may take me a bit of time to crawl out of this hole of self pity I have dug.............

8 days to go

Not really sure what is on the list today other than ordering pizza and researching proper Zombie killing techniques.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

9 days left :O

Okay, we have 9 days left. Plenty of time to get  ready for Z-Day.

Once again my plan for the day was to clean, but I got so involved with watching Caliou ( don't judge me, I like to criticize his parents, and yell at him for being so damn winy ) with Tori, I figured I can live with a messy house. AND when the ZA happens it will be more like an obstacle course for the Zombies than manage to enter my home. So it may end up saving our lives instead....

So today's list item will be:

SLEEP, yeah I know it sounds simple. But I want to sleep as much as possible before I enter the eternal dirt nap, just to reanimate and eat my loved one's brains.

Ya know , I just noticed that this really isn't much of a bucket list. It's more of an Apocalypse game plan. I don't really have anything I want to do before I die. I'm pretty simple like that. I have no desire to jump off a bridge or go sky diving. I know how my luck works.

Ohhh, and I need to figure out how to get all my men folk captured. It should be pretty easy. All I got to do is explain that the ZA is going to happen and that Z-Day is fast approaching and that if they want to live they must come with me and reproduce. The world is in our hands. And WE CAN DO IT!!! ( over and over, and over).

I also remembered a very important man that I must get for Team Z , are you ready for this? He is a VERY important person and have a ton of experience in taking down zombies.

Norman Reedus ( aka Daryl from the Walking Dead )

Yep we have to have him. He is a bad mofo, and he looks all swoonyfied ( new word?) when he is feeding a newborn baby!!! So he has many great talents!

Also now may be a good time to start gathering up weapons.
It doesn't have to be a bad ass gun. Gun shots attract walkers, and I'm the type of girl that could only take down one at a time.

A crossbow would be an excellent choice. Or a regular bow. But also plain ole tools that you will find in Hubby's tool box and garage would work fine. A screw driver to the eye works fantastically  A shovel, an ax, hell stock up on big pointy sticks. Just remember when the ZA happens, GO FOR THE HEAD!!! Any other body part on a zombie is a waste of time and a waste of your valuable energy.

We may want to start stocking up on canned foods about now. Doing this now we are way ahead of the crowd that doesn't know that Z-Day is fast approaching.

OKay?, What are you waiting for? Get you ass away from the computer and start gathering everything we need!!! I will be working on our men!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Joni's bucket list ( 10 day countdown Bitches!!!)

Seeing how the world could/could not/ most likely will not end in 10 short days, I figured it was time for me to write up my bucket list.  Are Y'all ready for a wild ride of crazy?

Item 1:  The plan for today was to detail clean and organize the holy crap out of this house, but seeing how it is now 2pm and I have yet to move my fat ass   perfectly formed behind out of this chair, I need to be a little more realistic.

So my number 1 item will be : gather all necessary materials for the ZA ( that's Zombie Apocalypse for those of you that don't know, but you should know, because this is a world wide epidemic that may be the very source for the end of life as we know it on December 21st, which will be further referenced to as Z-Day).

Now part of this prepairdness that I must adhere to is to gather all my fave men folk ( purely for reproductive needs , aww hell who am I kidding, because I am a lady horn dog and they make my lady bits all tingly). So we I must figure out a game plan for this. I need to coerce abduct:

1: Johnny Depp

2. Kieth Urban ( That bitch Nicole Kidman  can get her face chewed off for all I care)
3. Channing Tatum
4. Brantley Gilbert
5. Brett Michaels
6. And this beautiful piece of man candy ( aka The Walking Orgasm who shall remain nameless due to secrecy, and me and his other girlfriends a very special group of ladies, we do not wish to share him. Also for this reason his picture will not be stolen from his Facebook page because we stalk respect his privacy, and mainly because we don't want anyone else to hone in on what is ours.

That is stage one of my Z-day plan.

Tune in tomorrow for stage 2, and God only knows what else....

Tuesday, December 4, 2012


This is Baja. My wonderful sweet puppy. We lost him Sunday evening when he ran into the road and got hit by a jeep.  I am trying to come to terms with this. I spent a good 3 hours crying today. I miss him so much and the house feels so empty without him. I miss and love you Buddy. Rip...............