Pageant fever!!!!

So my Little has in the NRV pageant the other week where she got 1st runner up!!! In April she has state, and another local pageant..... So excited! Pictures to follow

I'm ALIVE!!!... And mostly sane

What started as this:

Turned into this:

And led me to be trapped indoors with 3 destructive, screaming, fighting Littles for a WEEK!!!!! That's right A Flippin WEEK!!!!!

After 2 bottles of wine, and the rest of my vodka, they are officially back in school today.

When fears become reality

As a parent of a MI child I know the fears of many other parents like me. We are a club that no one wants to be a part of yet we were somehow invited to join regardless of our wants. Our initiation? Melt downs, threats of suicide or harm to others, sudden burst of violence, our babies seeing and hearing things that we their parents can not see and hear.

We avoid the news like the plague. Instead invest ourselves into our normal, our sanctuary. Imaginary or not, but it keeps us sane. Until a bit a news sneaks past all of our defenses. This time? One name Kelly Thomas.

Although the incident took place in 2011, today's verdict took me back to the fear I felt when it first happened. It could be my daughter in 10 years, or any of my friends children. It's a fear that could easily become a reality as it did for Kelly's father Ron.

The NOT GUILTY verdict not only rattles me but also secures my fear. The fear that those that are supposed to serve and protect us are often the assailants. Instead of helping they are attacking with such force that it causes death.

Kelly was just sitting there.

The police were looking for a fight in my opinion.

They didn't stop beating on him, even after he had calmed down. They didn't have to taze a frightened schizophrenic young man 6 times, yet they did.

I watched the full attack (and I use the word attack because that is exactly what it is) video. It made me physically ill. I was heart broken and angry all at the same time.

How can they not be guilty?

Officer Ramos asked Kelly if he could see if fist, and when Kelly said yes, he said they were about to fuck him up. The police in that town were gunning for a fight. Early in the video you can see Ramos playing with his baton. Slapping it against his hip. I wasn't aware it was a toy to be played with. Perhaps it was to intimidate Kelly. In fact I'm sure it was to.

Things need to change!

We can not sit by and watch out MI children be treated this way.

There needs to be better training in place for the police.

There needs to be punishment for when these things happen!

They murdered a Mentally Ill person and got away with it. How does that make you feel?

Kelly after attack

 Full attack video

                                     

                                             Witness accounts after attack




No you tell me where that Not Guilty verdict made sense? Does this look like justice to you?

I don't want to live in a world where a person can get beat to death just because they seem different.

It is time for a change my friends, time for a change!

Just call me Susie Homemaker

I made a flan!,  Yep you read that right, I made a flan. Kaluah Flan to be exact.

                                         This is what I needed to make it.

                                             Melt 4 cups of sugar

                                                    Still melting
                                           

                                              Still melting

                                                  Stop messing with my rug!!

                                             Stop being nosy

                                                 Don't look at the cat                                          

                                                        STOP fighting
                                               

                                         

                                                          Don't watch me!

                                                  We're getting there

                                                 Finally all melty...... And guess what? I just made caramel!!!

                                                              Pour it into a baking dish

                                                      Whisk 4 eggs

 Add 1 can sweetened condensed milk, and 1 can of plain ole evaporated milk, and whisk it all together. 

                                               Yummy Kaluah

                                              1 shot for me

                                                  3 tablespoons for the flan

               Mix that shit up!

                                              Pour mixture on top of caramel , and put the dish in a larger baking pan.

                                            Pour hot water halfway up the side of the flan pan

                                            Bake for 50 minutes to a hour

Sprinkle powdered cocoa ( and I put semi-sweet morsels on top )

ENJOY!!!

Full recipe:

                   

                                          

 Ingredients
3/4 cup sugar
4 large eggs
1 (14-ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
1 (12-ounce) can evaporated milk
2 tablespoons coffee-flavored liqueur (recommended: Kahlua)
Mexican chocolate shavings and cocoa powder, garnish
Directions
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.

In a small saucepan, cook the sugar over medium heat until it starts to melt. Lower the heat and cook until caramelized to a golden brown. (Do not stir or touch the sugar, but swirl the pan to melt evenly.)

Pour into a metal flan mold or 9-inch cake pan. Turn the dish and swirl to evenly coat the bottom. Let caramel cool and harden.

Place the dish in a larger roasting pan and add hot water to come halfway up the sides of the baking dish. In a large bowl, whisk the eggs. Add the condensed and evaporated milks and Kahlua and whisk well to blend. Pour into the prepared pan. Bake until set and just firm in the center but still jiggles slightly, 50 minutes to 1 hour. Let cool on a wire rack. Refrigerate until well chilled, at least 2 hours.

To serve, run a thin sharp knife around the rim of the flan. Place a platter or large plate on top of the flan and gently flip over so the plate is on the bottom. Lift away the mold. Garnish with powdered cocoa and top with Mexican chocolate shavings.

Cut into wedges and serve immediately.

Holy Balls!!

I know I know, I haven't wrote anything in a hot minute. Well my dearies that is going to change. I have a metric fuckton of things to write about now. So much is going on, I just have to figure out where to start. And I'm gonna do things different this year. I'm going to start putting recipes up.. only the good stuff. The things I make and the kids hate, yeah not gonna put that shit up. Also we have quite a few pageants coming up and I'm going to blog about them as well. I need to do a write up for the last one we did in November. And there is a very personal issue I'm going to write about. And sooo many other things. So starting Monday, I will be back at it. I promise that I will have at least one decent things for Y'all to read about... and roll your eyes at a week :)

You wanna spork in the eye?

This is a public service announcement to all Husbands:

This whole post came to mind last night in bed when the Hubby was brave enough to ask when the last time I shaved my legs was.

First thought that came to my head was to cut him.

I'm here all day with the kids. I have a shit ton of errands to run. a house to clean, meals to prepare, and homework to oversee.

There are only so many hours in the day. Lets face it guys. We already have you! that and it's starting to get cold outside, and honestly no one will be able to see our legs. So if I want to save time and NOT shave my legs, be smart and don't say anything about it. Be happy that I am still trimming other areas. That and lets face it.... I don't even know when I last shaved.

Letter to my future self

Today I turn 23  32.

I like to think I have learned from all my past mistakes. That I will know what I need to do and when I need to do it.  So I think I need to write myself a letter so the future me knows how far I have come.

Dear Me,

You are another year older and wiser, not to mention rounder. Sitting here now think about how far you have come. You have overcome obstacles that would shatter a weaker person. You have suffered devastating losses yet you are still here. A little broken and bent, but stronger for making it through mostly intact. You have lost your biggest cheerleader and found that there are more people in this big ole world that care for you and want to see you succeed. You have made new friends and lost old ones. You have went through a horrible marriage, and when you thought you were to be forever alone you met the one person in the world that completes you and understands your craziness. You brought 3 precious lives into this world. And no matter how scary those first moments were, you are better because of them. You will continue to make mistakes and learn from them. And pass that knowledge onto your children. You are beautiful and are where you need to be. Life is always an uphill climb, and it wouldn't be worth living if we didn't stumble from time to time.

Think back on all that you have been through. Are you where you were 5 years ago? No. Will you ever get lost time back? No.

All you can do is look forward, keep putting one foot in front of the other, and remember that life is beautiful.